Why Does Adulting Feel So Hard? (Especially If You Have Anxiety or ADHD)
Let’s be real:
Adulting feels weirdly hard sometimes.
You wake up, try to tackle your to-do list, answer texts, make it to work, scroll a little (okay, a lot)… and suddenly the day is over. And you're left wondering:
“Why am I this tired? I didn’t even do that much.”
If you’ve ever felt like that, you’re not broken. You’re not lazy.
You’re just a human trying to function in a world that’s… a lot.
Let’s break it down.
🚨 First: Adulting Feels Hard Because It Is
Seriously. You’re not imagining it.
Modern life =
Constant notifications
Never-ending to-do lists
Pressure to be productive 24/7
An economy that makes basic life tasks harder than ever
A mental load that never fully turns off
All of this adds up—especially if you’re also dealing with:
Anxiety
ADHD
Burnout
Past trauma
People-pleasing tendencies
(Or hey… all of the above.)
🧠 Your Brain Isn’t Designed for This Much Input
We weren’t built to:
Be reachable all the time
Consume this much information daily
Juggle multiple jobs, side hustles, and personal growth goals
See everyone’s highlight reel on social media while comparing it to our low moments
If your nervous system is screaming “I’m overwhelmed!”—that makes sense.
This is not how humans were meant to live.
😵💫 What You’re Calling Laziness Might Be Burnout
Let’s clear this up:
Struggling to get things done doesn’t mean you’re lazy.
You might be:
Emotionally overstimulated
Burnt out from decision fatigue
Stuck in survival mode
Avoiding tasks because you’re anxious (not because you don’t care)
This is especially common if you have ADHD. Executive function burnout is real.
Sometimes your brain just says: “Nope.”
💼 Adulting = Emotional Labor + Mental Load
It’s not just chores and bills.
It’s:
Remembering your friend’s birthday
Managing your calendar
Replaying that awkward text
Thinking about what to make for dinner for the rest of your life
Worrying if your boss is mad
Feeling guilty for not calling your mom
Even if nothing “big” is happening, the invisible weight adds up. Every single day.
🧩 ADHD and Mental Health Can Make It Even Tougher
If you have ADHD, anxiety, or both (hello, comorbidity!), you may also deal with:
Task paralysis
Trouble starting things
Forgetting important details
Getting stuck in doom scrolls
Feeling like you “should” be doing more (and beating yourself up about it)
This cycle is exhausting—and it’s not your fault.
✨ What Can Actually Help
Here’s the good news: you don’t need to overhaul your life to feel better.
Here are some realistic, ADHD-friendly ideas to make adulting feel less overwhelming:
1. Start small. Like…really small.
“Put clothes in the hamper” is a task.
“Send one email” is enough.
Momentum builds. One step is progress.
2. Use systems that work with your brain.
Visual reminders (sticky notes, whiteboards, apps)
Time blocking with lots of breaks
“Body doubling” (do tasks with someone—even virtually)
Alarms with labels like “start dinner” or “turn off phone”
3. Limit your mental tabs.
Write everything down (so it’s not floating in your brain)
Keep your daily goals short: 2-3 things max
Batch tasks (errand day, email day, laundry day)
Say no when your plate is full (you’re allowed to)
4. Rest is not optional.
If you feel tired after “just existing,” that makes sense
Schedule rest the same way you’d schedule a meeting
Resting is not a reward—it’s part of staying functional
🧡 You’re Not Behind. You’re Not Failing. You’re Navigating a Lot.
Adulting is hard because life is complex right now.
Because the world asks too much and teaches too little.
Because your brain might be wired in a way that needs support—not shame.
You are allowed to:
Do less
Ask for help
Take a nap
Say “I’m doing my best” and mean it
If you’re Googling “why adulting feels so hard,” you’re not alone.
Between modern stress, burnout, anxiety, and ADHD, life can feel overwhelming even when you’re doing “normal” things. You're not lazy—you're human.
Take it one step at a time. Start small. Give yourself grace.
Want More Support?
If this resonated with you, and you're tired of trying to figure it all out alone—I’m here.
I work with Millennials and Gen Z who feel overwhelmed by life, stuck in cycles of burnout, and unsure how to move forward without guilt or pressure.
You’re allowed to slow down. Let’s find your way through—together.
